(via thesillysorostitute)

My only regret is that
I didn’t tell enough people
to fuck off.

My 92 year old grandma. (via intensional)

(via apatheticyeah)

tom-spanks:

remember when u were like 11 and the only thing u wanted was a lava lamp

(via tightvaginas)

(via stayy0ungandwild)

drunktrophywife:

Want to hear a fairytale? Once upon a time you weren’t such a little bitch

(via tightvaginas)

(via guy)

(via filthy-hippie-vibes)

jontronshat:

wentdog:

The ’50s were fucked up man.

*tries this at next house party*

(via stayy0ungandwild)

owlmylove:

when i find stretch marks on my thighs i make a point of smooching them because they’re just doing their best at keeping the all-powerful immortal Being within me from ripping my mortal shell asunder in a blaze of heavenly glory and eviscerating the cosmos in my divine wrath

(via thesillysorostitute)

joetrohnam:

my mom always lets me mash the potatoes because it helps me deal with my feelings 

(via thesillysorostitute)